Lost Video Island

[mistojen]

He'd Read It
A/N: What Boone might have been trying to tell Jack while on his deathbed.

“If your life was a book, no one would read it, Shan.”

Boone’s eyelids flutter and he gasps for air. His lungs are collapsing if they haven’t already; he can tell. Where were Jack’s pens, now? The thought almost makes him want to laugh against the tears stinging his eyes. Jack doesn’t need to see those, so he holds them back, but he can feel them. He can feel his whole body shutting down and he knows he is going to die.

He always thought it was some stupid, cliché thing that one’s life flashes before their eyes right before they die, but he knows now that that isn’t true at all. He can see flashes of broken memories. Boone can hear himself chastising Shannon again.

“I bet they would, Boone, you f***ing idiot. Do you know how many stupid, young girls would buy my book and read all about me, trying to be me? Any idea?”

“No, Shan, they’d read it and see the fraud you are. No one wants to be like you…you’re worthless.”

Conscious thoughts flood Boone and he loses his flashes. Jack is moving around, but Boone is only vaguely aware of his presence. He can see that the good doctor is spent; Boone thinks maybe he remembers Jack feeding his own blood into Boone to save him, but he isn’t sure if that was just a hallucination or not.

Where is his sister? Where’s Shannon? He means to ask, but the words won’t come. He needs her to know something, as trivial as it might sound to anyone else in the world. To her, it’ll mean everything.

Jack is apologizing for failing him. Boone wants to shake his head, wants to smile at Jack and tell him it’s all right and that he appreciates all the effort. All he can manage is to roll his eyes away a little as he gasps for air, and then tell Jack, “Don’t be.”

Boone knows he’s about to die. He feels himself passing. Shannon needs to know. “Tell Shannon…”

Jack is looking at him with interest, confusion and hard focus. He’s trying to take it all in. Boone can tell that Jack has every intention of telling Shannon.

“Tell Shannon…”

He can’t get the words out. Why, God damn it?! His body is giving up on him. “Tell…”

His lungs give out. They refuse now to take in any more air. All Boone can see is blackness though he knows his eyes are still open. The last thing he feels is a soft burst of oxygen letting itself out of him and the last thing he thinks is, “her…I’d read her book…”
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